If You Liked That, You’ll Love This.

People who read my journal regularly know just how much I love exposing – myself – NO, no, I mean exposing people to new things. The greatest thing about the Internet is its ability to connect people to new ideas, new artists, new musicians, new writers and new personalities that they might not otherwise have known. So, here’s a list to give you a taste of people you’ll like if you dig the work of some of the more well-known artists.

 

If you like Bjork, then you’ll love Venus Hum.

 

Photo Credit: Unknown, Courtesy of Venus Hum Myspace

  

Like Bjork, Venus Hum’s sound is unique, entrancing and intriguing as a peek into the mind of an autistic savant. With sounds as vibrant as colors, lyrics that form vivid word-pictures and a tongue-in-cheek satirical song writing technique that will leave their songs to vibrate with your soul, Venus hum is sure to delight you for hours on end. For your more metaphysical moods, try Humming Birds from Venus Hum’s first album. If you want something smart and dancey with industrial flair (complete with the sounds of closing doors, bubbling champagne, sipping, party chatter, and lilting laughs), check Pink Champagne.

 

 

If you like David Sedaris, then you’ll love Michael Downing’s Breakfast with Scot.

 

Downing’s Breakfast with Scot was recently made into a feature film, but one can easily assume that no film could translate Downing’s literary wit and panache. With clever one-liners like “… it was an ambidextrous cry for help for help” and “she spent her humor on her shoes”, Downing’s Breakfast will have you LOLing in no time. Meanwhile, Downing’s protagonist, Ed, will work his way into your heart with his totally open and often sarcastic honesty and his enduring analysis of the beautiful, yet imperfect nature of our society as seen through the eyes of its outcasts. Breakfast’s message is one of acceptance, because nobody fits in perfectly all time.

 

Here’s a trailer for the 2007 movie adaptation.

 

 

If you like Junior Vasquez, then you’ll love The Misshapes.

 

Photo Credit: Unknown, Courtesy of The Misshapes Myspace

 

A trio of uber-hip DJs from the NYC, The Misshapes have crashed onto the scene as one of the coolest music making machines to reinvent the club/house sound. In only a few short years after their formation The Misshapes are already in high demand from clubs starting in their native NYC, to old London and even the hipster capitol of the world, my beloved Austin. Of course, you all know that I’m partial to their mix of Shorti by V.I.P. with Pink Enemy, but they have also done a rockin’ remix of Madonna’s Jump.

 

 

If you liked The X-Files, then you’ll love Torchwood.

 

 

Photo Credit: Unknown, Courtesy of Wikipedia Entry – Torchwood

 

Okay, so the show’s technically sci-fi, but truly there’s only a little bit of science that is pushed aside easily for creativity, humor and – most importantly – sex. Don’t just think it’s the straight boys and girls getting all the action here. Captain Jack, a former time-traveler from the future who just so happens to be immortal, is a notorious flirt with an eye for girls and boys. One of the show’s most popular side-plots is a semi-secret love affair between Jack and Torchwood’s honorary butler, Ianto Jones. In the first series, the techie of the group, Toshiko, is involved in a lesbian fling with a malicious alien exile and Owen uses an alien super-pheromone to bed a woman and her boyfriend. As for the show’s immense popularity, it can be explained in-part by the show’s executive producer, Russell T. Davies who masterminded the Doctor Who comeback and the other part to the writers of fan fiction! Yes, that’s right, the show’s producers have admitted to reading and incorporating some of the most popular themes of fan fiction into the show, including the show’s now notorious romantic/sexual subplots.

Ten People You Probably Don’t Know, But You Should!

I’ve always been the curious, courageous explorer-type. I’m always in shock when people don’t want to try something new: a new type of food, a new book, a new band, etc. Life IS a banquet after all and there are some people out there doing some amazing sh#t, y’all! In that spirit, I bring you a list of ten people (bands, writers, photographers and generally fabulous personalities) that you probably don’t know, but you should.

 

      V.I.P (Party Boys)

 

I tried to like Pansy Division, I really did. The problem was that the songs were all too obvious. Yes, some of the coolest artists can make-up for bad songwriting with a good sound, solid vocals and a steady beat, but Pansy Division just lacks all of that in my eyes ears. My ex-boyfriend loved PD, so every time he put one of their CDs on I had to find somewhere else to be: hmmm… no trash to take out? Let me make some – I’ve been meaning to get started on my life-sized Madonna statue made entirely out of popsicle sticks.

 

These rap all-stars with a Lil’ Kim beat, a Missy Elliot hip-hop jive are coming ya with an always fabulous queer slant.V.I.P. is the real Feminem with their uncommon rhyming raps – and, as my name suggests, you should know how much I love industrial – sound that makes you want to dance till you just can’t dance no more. If you’ve ever wondered what a queer Beastie Boys would sound like, check out the electrotastic Misshapes mix of Shorti.

 

 

Photo Credit: Tyler Goosey, Courtesy of Chris Yarber Myspace   

 

Chris Yarber

 

With a sound like an audio-orgasm (an eargasm, if you will) Chris Yarber’s music will instantly conjure images of Duran Duran and Depech Mode. His deep vocals set on top of a steady, pulse-pounding melody will get your head bobbing and your feet moving. Let’s face it, sometimes the mood calls for total honesty, no matter how dark and Yarber’s track, A Reason To Lust is perfect for that emo-vampire goth orgy you’ve been planning.

 

Photo Credit: Unknown, Courtesy of Amazon.com   

     

    Meg Hentges

 

Brompton’s Cocktail, Hentges’ 1998 album may be ten years old, but it was light years ahead of its time with fancy keyboard work, strong beats and queer-friendly (sometimes outright queer) lyrics. The first single released (This Kind Of Love) for radio play on Austin’s famous, The Next Big Thing with Andy Langer was not well received by the mostly straight audience. While many listeners agreed she had a great sound (something akin to the industrial electropop DJ bands we hear out of NYC these days), they refused to swallow and chose to spit out the new-New Wave Hentges style.

 

But, if you have an open mind, you’ll love the retro sound of Hentges’ Brompton’s Cocktail. ‘Cause “girl and girl and boy and boy and girl and boy are workin’!”

 

Photo Credit: Jeffery Walls, Courtesy of MattildaBersteinSycamore.com and The Austin Chronicle  

 

    Matt Berstein-Sycamore

 

Matt isn’t your ordinary ‘mo – he’s been an advocate for the anti-assimilation camp among us new ‘radical fairies’ for a while now, just trying to keep us all from becoming dollar signs in the eyes of big-wig corporate types that are willing to market and sell to the gay community, but not willing to do anything else to support us.

 

His partially-autobiographical novel, Pulling Taffy, explores the non-assimilation stance in the queer community, the dangers of being a sex worker and the heartbreaking search for a place to call home. He’s also released several other compilations and anthologies, including: That’s Revolting: Queer Strategies For Resisting Assimilation, Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender and Conformity and Dangerous Families: Queer Writing on Surviving.

 

Photo Credit: Unknown, Courtesy of Gabe Lopez Myspace   

 

     Gabe Lopez

 

So you’re looking for a little more of a pop rather than the punk, the electro, the techno and the industrial, huh? I’ve got the solution for you with Gabe Lopez and his Indie-rocker tunes. Lopez has written songs for American Idol alum Jim Verraros and his skill with writing a catchy little song shows. His sound is mellow and his pitch is always perfect. Imagine that: a gay man that can write songs and sing them in the correct key! Okay, so there are some of them out there, but they can be few and far between. My favorite track? Check out Red Queen and strut your stuff, roughcuff!

 

       Photo Credit: Michael Zavus, Courtesy of IceCreamTruck Myspace   

 

IceCreamTruck

 

He’s like ice cream on hot summer day, that much is evident, but this humpy guy is not just eye-candy, he’s a talented photographer and great philosopher with a terrific message for empowering the queer community. He’s launching a new GLBT dating website, GetSteady.com: Get Ready To Get Steady!

 

Photo Credit: Anonymous, Courtesy of SOR Myspace   

 

    Streets of Rage

 

I know you, you need a little bubblegum in your punk. If you think Ween meets Nada Surf with a little bit of a HelloandGoodbye highschool confessional feel, you’ve got SOR.

 

They’re like Fall Out Boy with a little more street cred. Check out their track, Let’s Flip A Coin for a dancey little ditty about unrequited teenage love and spin around your room humming the song till the ‘rents tell you to stop. You can download their EP free off their Myspace page.

 

Photo Credit: Jorgey, Courtesy of Mitchell’s Myspace

 

    Mitchell and OutWithMe.com

 

When I was in high school, I remember how all the kids would come back from long weekends with story after story of their drunken debauchery. Of course, you would never believe them about what a good time they’d had. No mater how good they said it was, you knew you could top it. You needed the photographic evidence. Like magic, photos of uber-cool scensters, hipsters and emos came pouring out of their backpacks and purses.

 

Mitchell and OutWithMe.com have capitalized on this overwhelming need to make the scene and be seen with candid event photography helping to put Austin on top of the list of tragihip world destinations. And why not? Austin’s the live music capitol of the world, after all. Where there’s music, there are the music makers and their legions of inspired fans. So go and check the guylinered prettyboys with foppish hair and the made-up mollies’ kissy-faced candids.

 

Photo Credit: Anonymous, Courtesy of Leslie Cochran Myspace   

 

    Leslie Cochran

 

He’s run for mayor of Austin two times and by some fluke, he’s never won. He’s Austin’s favorite (honorary) son, a homeless advocate who now lives in a mansion and transvestite dynamo with his own magnetic “dress me” doll!  Well, sure he has a beard and it can be frightening to see him crossing Congress Avenue in high heels, or hanging out on Sixth Street in his catholic schoolgirl uniform, but he helps to Keep Austin Weird.  

 

Photo Credit: Anonymous, Courtesy of Captain Badass Myspace   

 

    Captain Badass

 

We’re in a recession here people; some superheroes can’t afford a steady gym membership! So, his only power is being a total and complete badass, but you don’t want to get on his bad side, ‘cause he’s got plenty of them. He’s the original badass and an Austinite with flair.

Further Evidence that Keanu Reeves is “The One”.

He can fire a gun without pulling the trigger! Observe:

Ein Cop. Eine Stadt. Eine Sorcerer.

Burn him! He’s a WITCH!

Sorry, I don’t know the German for sorcerer.

F&#ked stupid? Only slightly different than f@#ked, stupid.

You see, the latter implies a pre-existing condition (another reason to deny us health care; someone call Michael Moore!)

Has anyone here ever been f^&ked stupid? You know, like when afterward it takes you a long time to remember your own name and you stumble a lot like your channeling Anna Nichole Smith (God bless her drugged-out soul).

“Do you looooove me? What’s your name? Sugar-pie, SHUT-UP!”

I have the feeling this may be epidemic in the gay community and, unfortunately, the top slapped the bottom on the back right afterward and they’re stuck like that for life. It would explain my BFF for, like, two months five years ago and all his tremor-y behavior… well… that and cocaine.

“Cocaine’s a helluva drug!” When Rick James is right, he’s… well… sober? Hell, I dunno.

Oh! And what the hell is the appeal of public men’s room sex? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? I’m gay, but not to an insane degree. I mean, God, the smell alone; urinal cake technology has advanced only so far.

And, I’m sorry Senator, but the “wide stance” angle doesn’t make any rational sense. You have to do the splits to drop a Cosby at the public pool? What the f%$k are you, a sumo wrestler?

Now women’s rooms… I once accidentally (yes, I’m telling the truth, damnit) walked into one at a restaurant in Jersey — Jersey: my God, the beautiful Italian boys: greasy enough to wipe their foreheads, wring out the wrag and fry chicken (just like I love ‘em) — and there was a phucking loveseat! A phuking antique loveseat in the bathroom and it was GORGEOUS! Frankly, I’m shocked that there isn’t a non-stop lesbian orgy in those places all day, everyday.

So, you may want to know why I ask these thing and the answer is simple to me and probably complicated to everyone else. I drum to the march of a different beater — wait, that’s not right! Oh well, you know what I mean. Long story short, I’m working on my book, Southern, Fried, which is to be an odd mix of a non-linear memoir, a self-help parody, and a comedic look a politics and western culture and I want to make sure I’m not talking out of my ass here: something I wouldn’t be surprised if one of you could do literally!

Oh and boys, I feel like a prick — but don’t I always? — for asking, but there is an implied copyright to all of this as it will be going in my book, in some form or another. That being said, I don’t care if you re-post, but please give credit were credit is due. *curtsy*

My Moto

Let he who is without faggotry cast the first stiletto!

Buzznet encourages masturbation!

According to Buzznet, I should meet myself(?) Huh? I’m not sure, but I think that’s still illegal in some states.